Bismillah.
Does it make sense?
...No, for me it doesn't.
Does it make sense? Kenal sebab kawan kenalkan each other, then contact through WhatsApp, tanya soalan nak berkenalan dalam sebulan gitu...lepas tu jumpa beramai-ramai makan sama-sama.
That's it. Jumpa just once.
And time-time tu jugak kawan tanya, "So...bila nak jumpa mak bapak?"
....Kepala hotak dia.
Kawan kesayangan aku ni, Tapi ada jugak yang aku marahkan dia.
"Senang buat macam tu, nanti takdelah kenal lama-lama lepas tu tak jadi."
1. Tak adil. Kau sendiri kahwin dengan kawan yang kau kenal dari kecil. Even so, at some point in the past you were still not sure if you will marry him or not. Itu kawan dari kecik tau, aku ni? Baru first time jumpa.
2. Hati budi orang ni pun aku tak tau. Apa dia suka, apa dia tak suka. What's my likes and dislikes pun dia tak tahu. Nama penuh each other pun tak tau! And you think we should already make a move for the next step in relationship? What relationship?? At this point I don't even consider him as friends! And you want me to meet his parents already? WTH??
3. Not in line with my values. Orang macam aku, if I am to adopt/accept a certain learned knowledge/facts, I need to make sure it's in line with my own logic. Example: Kalau belaja Math, belaja mesti sampai faham dalam hati, dan dengan keyakinan. Kalau takat hafal, nope, won't work. Right now, you are telling me to just go on with it without conviction. And that's against my values.
Huh...
Maybe I should just stop this. Just tell them that I can't do it. I can't do what they expected me to do. Bukan salah mamat tu pun. He didn't do anything. Kawan-kawan yang pushy tanya so what's the next plan. Although I understand their view, but that doesn't necessarily mean I agree with them. I have my own values.
Kawin tanpa kenal betul-betul? Not my style. If I'm gonna marry, better marry with conviction. Sorry friend, I hope this won't affect our friendship.
Huh...perhaps it's just me. Aku yang nak kenal-kenal dulu. Kawan dulu. Maybe diorang punya perception lain, once I agree to meeting up, that means I want to proceed with the relationship. Maybe this part is where we misunderstood each other. Maybe it's worth clearing this up between all of us.
So first, I would need to be clear with that mamat. It's not his fault, just that if he's expecting the same thing, I would have to say no. I didn't agree to this with that kind of mindset. I need to ask him first what he thinks about it, before telling him my thoughts.
Second, let my friend know that I'm not going to go through with it. Like she said, better stop now that let it continue longer than it should. Tell her I'm not in this with marriage mindset.
Third, I need to setup a game plan on my own, if I want to search for some guy friends to get to know. Maybe this friend-introduce thing won't work as effective, especially since this guy is a close friend to both of them. So I would be seen as the bad guy if I did something wrong.
And all in all, ask God for guidance.
Hmm...what kind of game plan? Tinder? Out of the question. Those matchmaking websites? Don't know how far should I trust them. But right now I'm sure, I need to do this on my own. Doing it with help from others brings too much pressure.
Relax, you're not rushing to get married. You're happy with being single right now, it's just that you're curious on whether you would want to get married or not if you know some guy friends.
We'll see.